What’s so funny about this? I’m always amazed at how relaxed dogs and cats can get and look when they’re lying around the house. Scooter, my own pooch, is no exception. Nobody does it better, especially when he spreads his legs and plops his head on the floor. When I saw a photo of a sheep and a dog lying on a kitchen floor together, I knew I had the right picture for today’s spoonerism. Another way to describe what these animals are doing is with the word “flop”. It’s a funny sounding word, to my ears at least, and it can be both a verb and a noun. In verb form it means to completely let your body go as you fall and land on the floor. It can also mean to move around on the floor in a lying position; this is known as flopping and the best example is the movements of a live fish out of water on a boat deck or floor. Another very different meaning is to fail at something, but that’s an audioboo for another day. In old school slang the noun flop can also mean a bed or a room in a cheap hotel known as a “flop house.” You can imagine what a kitchen floor will look like if there’s a sheep and a dog flopping on it. If you’re a “neat freak” who has to obsessively clean everything, then this is a spoonerism you might say, before or after you wash the floor with a mop. If you’re saying “mop some floor” and you spoonerize it, then the result is “flop some more”. Our friends the dog and sheep will be only too happy to oblige you once the floor has dried. And THAT’s what’s so funny!
Listen to my audioboo - https://audioboo.fm/boos/2442640-flip-flop
LIGHTEN YOUR LOAD
What’s so funny about this? Light bulb jokes are in a whole category by themselves. They all begin with “How many (fill in the name) does it take to change a light bulb?” Mostly, these jokes fall into the category of insult jokes. After all, it doesn’t take a lot of brains to change a bulb. So the implication is that if you’re a member of a particular nationality, or religion, or profession, then you don’t have the brains to change a bulb by yourself. I’ll admit that some of these jokes are extremely funny, but I tend, most of the time, to avoid jokes that might offend one group or another. So in today’s joke the target group is baby sitters. Just by asking the set-up question there’s already an implication that an insult is coming. But when you get to the answer to the question you’re hit with a pun on the word “change”, which makes it a delightful surprise. There’s no mystery what it means to change a light bulb. The word “change” here means replace. BUT changing a baby does NOT usually mean replacing a baby, since once you get one, they tend to be permanent. Instead, changing a baby is really a euphemism for changing a baby’s diaper’s, a task that’s required of parents and baby sitters. Diapers are made of cloth, but a disposable diaper that you can just throw away is called a Pamper, which is what the joke is talking about. So the image you get is a light bulb needing a new pamper or diaper. Hopefully most light bulbs don’t leak, much. And THAT’s what’s so funny!
Listen to my audioboo - https://audioboo.fm/boos/2438194-lighten-your-load
CAN YOU GUESS THIS IDIOMATIC EXPRESSION?
What’s so funny about this? There are a couple of funny things about this picture. One is, of course, the statement about the clowns. The other is the fact that it’s posted by an animal clinic. I’d expect to see the sign say something like, “free shampoo” when your pet gets vaccinated”, or “We’ll train your dog and keep him well -groomed”. Or something like that. So, what does this animal clinic have against clowns? Maybe the vet used to work in a circus and had a bad experience with them. Hard to believe though. Clowns are supposed to be sweet and lovable, even or especially the jugglers. Clowns are always smiling and clowning around and making other people laugh. We do have to remember however, that a clown’s smile is painted on. It’s hard to tell what they are really thinking. Nevertheless I find it hard to picture a mob of clowns attacking anyone except maybe to throw pies in their face. The joke is actually a pun on the expression “go for the jugular” which is the large vein that goes up and down your neck. When animals attack they instinctively will try to bite their victim there because it will cause a quick death. Only with the clowns it’s the juggler and not the jugular that’s being recommended. BTW, a juggler is the guy who tosses all those balls and bowling pins in the air. Maybe once the juggler is down the rest of the clowns will scamper away in panic. And THAT’s what’s so funny, I guess.
Listen to my audioboo https://audioboo.fm/boos/2435161-animal-antics
Origin: Late 19th Century, American English - Contrary to popular opinion, this expression did not come out of World War II. It already appeared in print in 1895. Except, until the mid 20th Century it was always used in the literal sense, as a paratrooper would do, or a hobo jumping from a train. Eventually it became metaphoric, or idiomatic referring to any situation requiring someone completely ready to do a job.
Usage: Informal, spoken and, general, American and English
Idiomatic Meaning: To begin or start something fully prepared and with a lot of energy
Literal Meaning: To jump from an elevated position, e.g. a train or an airplane, onto the ground and immediately start to run
Why is this funny? In the photograph we see a man or a woman about to land on the ground after having jumped out of an airplane with a parachute, which, fortunately slowed the rate of decent so that he or she could land on their feet and immediately perform a job they have been intending to do. They hit the ground running so they could “hit the ground running.”
Sample sentence: Before I became a professional skydiver, I jumped off a lot of stairs, so I could “hit the ground running” as soon as I got the new job.